ALICE IN CHAINS

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We are finally getting settled in to the new house. It’s a nice house, my wife did a good job as usual. She makes all the decisions when it comes to this stuff. Every house we have ever built she picked out and designed and decorated. I have no interest in that stuff so she handles it all. She asks me my opinion on things and I tell her I don’t care but she makes me give her an answer and then she ignores me and does what she wants.

My new office is cool, I have a sofa in it so I can take a nap during the day. One bad thing about working out of the house is the kids will come in my office when I am working and just start talking to me so as a joke I put a sign on my door that says “no girls allowed”. My daughter took it down and replaced it with a sign that says “pretty girls only” now every one is allowed in my office except my sister in law.

The younger ones are back at school and although it is quiet I miss not having them home. It’s nice to get a hug in the middle of the day for no reason. They are an exception to my rule, they can hug me whenever they want. My oldest is still here, she doesn’t go back to college till the end of the month. She had a great summer. Her and some friends went to South Africa for three weeks and had a blast and now when when I ask her what she wants for Christmas she says “a South African man”. She worked hard to save her money so she could go. I am very proud of her because she is such a hard worker. She gets up at 4am every day and works at Typhoon Lagoon and then drives to the beach and gives surf lessons till 6pm. She is only twenty and has already been to Europe, Central America and now Africa. After saving so much money she was worried about spending it on a trip and thought maybe she should save it. I told her to spend it and go to South Africa. You’re only young once and there will be plenty of time to save later when life takes over but she may never get a chance to travel again.

I am glad she turned out to have such a good work ethic because we don’t teach that enough. We focus too much on education and not enough on work ethic. A good work ethic will always take you further than a diploma.

You know when apartheid ended and Nelson Mandela became president he had all of the white people who had committed atrocities come before a court and admit to what they had done – and then he let them go. He just wanted them to acknowledge their crimes. It is amazing to have that kind of forgiveness in you. I wish I was like that but I’m not, I do not forgive or forget and I hold a grudge forever. It is one of my many bad qualities.

You know those African women who put those rings around their neck and over the years it stretches their neck? I am worried about them. After time their neck muscles weaken and if the rings are removed their neck can’t support their head. I am worried that if they travel to America the TSA will make them remove those rings and their head will fall off.

I could never be gay. I am too violent with other men and I would be like “WHAT DO YOU MEAN STRIPES DON’T GO WITH PLAID?” and then I would punch him. My wife dresses me isn’t that pathetic? I am 42 years old and my wife has to tell me what to wear. It started a long time ago when I showed up somewhere and she was embarrassed by what I was wearing so now she puts my clothes out for me. The rules of fashion are too confusing to me because to me everything matches.

I want all of my girls to travel so they can see other cultures. The best education I ever received was traveling the world when I was in the Navy. I also want them to realize how good they have it. They get mad when the DVR doesn’t record one of their shows and there are kids who have to walk miles to get a drink of water.

When I was growing up we had three channels and the only show on was the fucking Brady Bunch. For those of you not from America I will give you a brief synopsis: It’s a story of a lovely lady who was bringing up three very lovely girls. All of them had hair of gold, like their mother, the youngest one in curls. She meets a man named Brady who was busy with three boys of his own, they were four men, living all together, yet they were all alone. And they knew it was much more than a hunch, that this group would somehow form a family. That’s the way they all became the Brady Bunch.

They also had a maid named Alice and they made her wear a uniform and live in the fucking laundry room. She was fucking a butcher named Sam.

Anyway, I have a lot of catching up to do but I will see you soon.

So how many of you are singing the Brady Bunch song?

141 thoughts on “ALICE IN CHAINS”

  2. South African men are hot. That accent … holy fuck.

    You forgot “Until one day when the lady met the fellow, and they knew that it was much more than a hunch.”

    Glad that the house is coming along nicely. :-)

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  3. As usual, a social commentary disguised as a life narrative. I also worry about those rings around the ladies’ necks. I’d stare at my National Geographic, wondering how they ever got them on–or off. They’re not designed to come off, ever, but it was difficult for me to contemplate that when I was 10.

    I’m glad you’re getting settled in your new place. Our house is really similar – I make all the decisions about the decor, etc., and funny thing is, Mr. B doesn’t even want to deal with it. He tells me “you take care of it.” He does dress himself, though, but it’s easy because everyone where we live in Silicon Valley dresses the same. I mean, all the engineers dress the same, and then all the business guys dress differently – but all the same. And if you own your own company, you dress however the heck you want. But it’s pretty obvious when you’re walking around here who does what.

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      • It *is* kind of like that, actually. What’s really funny is that the engineers think they’re being so individual by dressing in their jeans and tees – kind of like a “stick it to the man” sentiment. But in reality, they all end up looking identical. I can’t fault the finance guys; that’s how they’re hardwired.

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  4. Damn you for putting that ear worm in my head! And I think Alice’s plight is what prompted me to became a trade unionist when I grew up. Having to spend your life in the laundry room, wear a uniform AND sleep with Sam the Butcher would make anybody want to fight for social justice.

    Congrats to you and Lexie on the new house!

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  5. This a great post. Yes, now the Brady Bunch song is stuck in my head. I hate you a little for that. I wish I had someone to give me the advice you give your oldest daughter when I was young and impressionable.

    MB is colorblind so almost everything he owns is khaki and things that match khaki. Business trips are a little trickier, but I pack his suitcase with each outfit together to avoid confusion. I stopped asking his opinion on anything decorating or fashion-related when we were engaged. I asked him about what we should have embossed on the napkins for the reception. His response, “Why the hell are we having napkins? Can’t they just use paper towels and be done with it?”. That was 13 years ago.

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  6. I have to agree with Ruthie on South Africans. I don’t blame your daughter for wanting one for Christmas. :D I would want one too.

    Yes, I ended up with the Brady song in my head. However, I didn’t grow up with them, only in re-runs.

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  8. The Brady Bunch?? Thank you very much, that song is going to be in my head ALL DAY!! :evil:
    It’ so nice to hear you talk about your girls, and see how proud you are of them. Did Lexie pick out your blue “suit” and cape?
    I spent all day yesterday looking for this post! I got the e-mail early in the morning….nothing all day. Glad it’s here now, and your settled in your new house. Hey Lexie…great job!

    Hmm, hmmm, The Brady Bunch… ARGH!!!!!

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  10. I have to dress my husband too. When we first met he would wear two different kinds of plaid together and don’t even get me started on how he puts other colors together.

    ooooh, you better hope your Sister in law doesn’t read this blog or you’re gonna be in trouble!

    That’s an awful song but I’ve had worse stuck in my head. Plus it will be fun driving me kids crazy by singing it all day! ;)

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  11. I know a trio of HOT South Afrikan brothers who live in Miami! Tell her i can give her their phone numbers!!! Haha hot accent but hard to understand

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  12. I have to honestly say, Hubs is the one with strong opinions about decorating etc. If I have a strong opinion about something I’ll stick to it , but if I’m in the middle? He makes me tell him what I think, and then does what he wants. sound familiar RM? We have carpeting up the stairs, and in our guest room, he hates to this day. I love it!!!

    Ahem…… BLUE!! :roll:

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  13. Mr. RM Your wife is awesome, your kids are awesome, and you’re a sweetheart in a strictly manly way.
    You also are very lucky, my daughters hug me several times a day, but then they proceed to wrestle each other, so there is no peace at home when they’re together. My son hugs me when he wants a new video game.
    I tried to tell my husband that the clothes he was wearing didn’t combine, but he said that he didn’t care. I decided to ignore his lack of fashion sense, but I told my mother in law that he chose his clothes himself, so I’m not to blame if he didn’t look like as she liked.
    I agree with about teaching our children how lucky they are, and also agree with you about work ethics, but I guess I’m going to keep agreeing with you, because I’m afraid of making you mad, and that you could held a grudge to me and never forgive me. It could lead to an international conflict and as I already told you, I don’t want any.

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  14. I do the same thing with my hubby when we go out to eat. I will ask him where he wants to go and he always says I don’t care. Then I get annoyed and say, tell me where YOU want to go. He tells me and then we go somewhere else =). He says that not once in 18 years have I listened to him so why do I ask? Why??? <> Must be a wife thing =).
    I LOVED the Brady Bunch.

    ‘Marcia! Marcia! Marcia!’
    ‘Now I’ll never be a teen model!’
    And of course, who can forget the Brady’s trip to Hawaii with the cursed idol! LOL.

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  15. I forgot about Vincent Price, but I remember the big, hairy spider on I think it was Peter’s chest =). And somebody almost getting knocked out by a falling picture on their head =).
    Best part about that show was that Mrs. Brady was doing Greg in real life and Mr. Brady was probably fantasizing about Sam =).

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  16. Here’s the story, Of a lovely lady……… Okay not singing it anymore!!

    Glad you are liking your new home and your daughter has an AWESOME job! We took our youngest to Baton Rouge over the summer to Blue Bayou and there were lots of kids working it. It is great to have that kind of job opportunity for your girls. Where I live, there isn’t much for kids to do. My middle son worked at ServPro all Summer…. not very exciting (sometimes they do get to clean up after a dead body,though). Also he built fence…. he is an excellent fence builder if anyone needs one built! He started Jr College this week.

    When I think of SAfrica this week I think of Oscar Pistorius, the Olympian runner, he is very inspiring and has a great story.

    AND my husband can’t match for crap! I buy all of his clothes and tell him what to wear too! He would still be wearing 1980′s apparel if he could still fit in them!

    Have a great weekend!

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  17. Wearing the rings around the neck was one of the ways to get husbands years ago. Now I think they use them to attract tourists thus make a living that way. So the probability of them traveling by airplane is pretty slim but its nice of you to care.
    Glad your daughter had fun is SA. Hope to visit there someday but I think I’ll have to hit the major spots in my own country first.
    And am one of the {un} lucky few who don’t have the Brady Bunch song stuck in their head :)

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  18. Did you change it at all from yesterday cause this didn’t suck as you said…or maybe to you it did cause you hardly swore.

    Hubs worked from home when my twins were 2yo until 8yo when he got laid off. If the door was closed they knew they couldn’t go in, but when it was open and he wasn’t on a conference call they would go in and give hugs and sometimes just play near him. 4 years later and he says that is what he misses most. And I totally understand as I realize what I will miss now with my new job…cherish!

    My Kiddos DVR the Brady Bunch they Love it – along with Batman! All I have to say is “Oh My Nose!!!!”

    Yes Alice and Sam so sneaking around and YES song is now stuck in my head.

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  20. My hubs fights me all the way on the house stuff – we discuss it, then he does what he wants. Once I waited until he was out of town for awhile and bought a sofa set. He has never mentioned it or commented on it. We actually have a coffee table that is 45 years old – he keeps re-finishing it. Your wife is a very lucky lady, in more ways than one!

    Mr Brady (the actor not the TV persona) was gay. When that came out after he died it was a big deal….isntt that sad?

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  21. Congratulations on the new house! You made my morning with this post. Thank you! I’m not too appreciative of the song now running through my head, but I’ll get over it. LOL
    You have some pretty special girls from the sounds of it. As someone who recently lost her dad, all I ask is that you let them know how special they are to you. It matters more than you’ll ever know:)

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  22. I applaud what your daughter has already accomplished. I agree with you wanting your girls to know how the rest of the world lives. To so many around the world, even our poorest live like kings. I have always been and always will be “strictly dick” but have a tremendous respect for the gay community and their fight to be treated like everyone else. Because hey, they are everyone else. I couldn’t stand Marsha and her hair twirling ways. I wanted to be Jan. That is, until she refushed to wear her glasses and crashed into the garage. I lost a lot of respect for her after that episode. Even with her helmet hair and crazy white shoes, Alice still made one hell of a meatloaf. Glad you are all settled. And yes, I’ll be humming that stupid song all damn day.

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  23. See RM? You may think it sucked, but we all needed your attention!
    You certainly covered a variety of topics! :shock:

    So…..are you ready for football?? Cough cough……
    Speaking of holding a grudge, are we still not allowed to say..( whispering) redskins???? :eek:

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    • OH My I loved David Cassidy and the Partridge Family. I had them play “I Think I Love You” at my wedding reception, made all my girlfriends come out on the dance floor and sing it with me.

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      • I loved it too! I was like…….13 years old. Good lord did I want David Cassidy. Now he’s an old fart and I’m looking towards the younger guys…..ya know…the one’s who are about 35 or so. I’m a cougar-wannabe!

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        • I was soo in love with David Cassidy. That perfectly feathered hair with the buttons on his denim shirt slightly open gracing the cover of Tigerbeat . I now have “I think I love you” running through my head instead of the BB. Thank you, much better song :-)

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  25. Hi RM! So thanks to the fickle computer gods, I’m the lucky one that recieved the full phantom post yesterday afternoon. When I found out no one else got the whole thing I was gonna put it on e-Bay, but everyone was so pissed off I decided to wait and take bids from the BBLs. Then you posted it and ruined my visions of riches. Plus I have the Brady song in my head. So you’ve pretty much trashed my day, thanks a lot. ;-)

    I love what you said about work ethic being more important than diplomas. I have 2 expensive degrees that I mostly paid for myself, and I’ve come to the conclusion that experience is so much more important. I’m telling my kids the same thing.

    I always realized that Alice and Sam were fucking but OMG thanks for the image of her blowing him. Never would have thought of it. Ugh!

    I’m really glad you posted this! As I told everyone yesterday, it doesn’t suck. And I wasn’t really gonna share it. :-)

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  26. RM for a person who hated the Brady bunch you sure know a lot about it lol I love hearing you talk about your girls you can hear the pride. I have only traveled in US but I hope one day to go to Scotland.
    And yes I am hearing Brady Bunch in my head thanks lol.

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    • Scotland is awesome. I love to travel. And I know alot about the show because I have seen every episode it’s all that was on

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    • I didn’t get it at first either. There is a band called Alice in Chains so I was trying to figure out what the hell this post had to to with a rock band. :)

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  28. you are one blessed man with your harem! hey i didn’t know alice was doing ‘it’ with sam. i thought mr. b was doing it with sam. never mind.

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  29. I’ve missed you, RM. This is a GREAT post. It’s all the layers. (I like layers!)

    I think I’m going to use your sign idea for my home office. My boys are still young enough to take most things literally. So “NO PENISES ALLOWED” should do the trick.

    Enjoy the new digs!

    P.S. I completely expected to be spinning some serious grunge music in my head but ended up with a 70′s TV theme song. That’s just plain mean.

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  30. Great post! :) I want my kids to travel when they’re older as well. I’ve been to a few places, before I met the DH, but haven’t done nearly enough travelling and unless I win the lottery I can’t see it happening any time soon. We’re the same with out kids, and try to make them aware of the world around them and how lucky they are to have all the shit they have .

    I have to dress my husband, if I let him do it, he’d look like nobody owned him lol

    And I’m jealous, I want a cool office! Glad the move went well :)

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  31. Ya know……in spite of the fact that you’ve put a totally moranic song in our heads (thank you so much)…..there is one thing that shines in your blog-post today and guess what that is?

    That you love your wife and daughters above all else. I think it’s kinda sweet……

    PS: Alice did so-NOT sleep with Sam the butcher. They had a purely platonic relationship. I grew up watching first run BB shows and all Alice and Sam did was go bowling and meet up in the butcher shop.

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  32. I will admit that I have the Brady Bunch song in my head.

    And having a good butcher is essential, so if Alice was fucking Sam then she is a smart lady.

    Meat is expensive and you can only imagine the manual dexterity of a man who can butcher a crown rack of lamb.

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    • LOL I won’t answer the weird question but I think you’re in the minority. It originally aired in the early 70′s but the reruns are still on. I have the song memorized still. We used to sing it on the bus on HS band trips with all the other stupid TV theme songs. Green Acres anyone? :-)

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  34. I’m so glad you changed your mind!

    I totally understand why your daughter wants a SA man, I have a friend from there and I could listen to him talk all day!

    I never saw The Brady Bunch until they did a film remake! and all I could think about when I read the title of your blog was a song that one of our (UK) comedians (Roy Chubby Brown) released several years ago called “Who the f##k is Alice”. (A remake of “Living next door to Alice”)

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  35. I dated a man from South Africa once. What a dreamy accent :) Then I found out he was a cheating lying sack of shit and I dumped him.

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  36. RM this is a good post. I learned alot about your family from this post! Its awesome that your daughter has that much confidence, to travel the world like that. You done good for her.

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  37. Thanks for making me laugh, I really needed it today. I’m glad you decided to post this, it was great and the teaser from yesterday was killing me.

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  38. So you reposted that exact computer page that was up yesterday morning. The one I just happened to catch before I left for work? The one that had a comment from me as the first response? Hmmm, funny, I don’t see my post way up there at the top. And then, you put a snake cake on your FB page. Honey badger don’t care about snakes but I do!!! Didn’t I just tell you I hate snakes?! So this is all a plot to get me to stop posting on your blog and FB page. First, humiliating me with your edit button, then deleting my comments, and now creating a hostile environment with snakes. Look, if I intimidate you that much, I can dumb things down. Where are my crayons?

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  39. I don’t have the Brady Bunch song stuck in my head. I’ve got Man In The Box by Alice In Chains stuck in there. Along with some fucked up images of Alice the maid in some BDSM scenarios.

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  41. RM , we don’t get BB reruns here so I haven’t been assaulted by the theme song or I think I love you swirling around in my brain nonstop for a long time….thanks for that…I just hope I don’t wake up tomorrow having had it play in my dreams :(

    We have many accents here in NZ , including SA and other British Commmonwealth accents (Irish,Scottish, Canadian…) We also have many Pacific Islanders in addition to the native Maori (native since they arrived and kicked/killed the Moriori out) Anyway we have Samoans and Tongans , Cook Islanders , Fijians… and on and on , with many of the NZ populations exceeding the populations in the home islands :)

    So you may not want to let your daughter visit NZ :)

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  42. I saw a post on Fb it went something like this: Kids today have an I-Phone, I-pad, Wii and/or X-box plus a computer for entertainement. I had OUTSIDE!!!

    Alice was kept chained on Sam’s Butcher block for his entertainment. I was told that Alice didn’t mind!

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  43. PS: I sing the theme to the Brady Bunch all the time. I have 3 girls 11-13-15 and my niece-20. Plus there is the KID traffic & SLEEP overs. I do a GREAT Mrs Brady!

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    • Sometimes when I least expect it (Often when I am at work about to teach a computer class) the theme to Sesame Street get stuck in my head and it won’t come out…odd since I never was allowed to watch it and my children watched Disney Channel never Sesame Street….

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      • When my house looks like a hurricane hit….I start humming the clean up song from Barney….I NEVER WATCHED Barney.

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  44. This post didn’t suck at all! I’m so glad that you re-posted it!

    Yes, you totally got me singing the Brady Bunch…Thanks a bunch! :( And I really didn’t need that visual of Alice & Sam with chains!
    David Cassidy was ok on the Partridge family, but Sean Cassidy on the Hardy Boys was soooo much better!
    Glad you like the new house & I agree with an earlier post, Lexie & your girls are awesome!

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    • My sister would kiss her poster of Shawn Cassidy every night – put lip gloss on and everything – wore his lips off the poster. David was older – I guess even then I like older men

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  46. No idea why you would have scratched this post, because it’s a real good one.

    We got the Brady Bunch in Canada, although, I think much later than it was actually aired in the U.S. I didn’t like the show, the girls in the show were annoying to me.

    YES, Sean Cassidy and the Hardy Boys. I had a crush on Sean. That show trumped those white-sock-high-water-pants wearing Brady boys any day. (I apologize to those who drooled over the oldest Brady boy)

    Your reference to Alice reminded me of something that happened to my mom and a butcher. Not that she looked like Alice, nor did she get frisky with the butcher.

    Shortly after my parents immigrated to Canada, my mom purchased an Italian/English dictionary in a used book store, to help her assimilate to her new country. She went to the butcher and with book in hand, literally translated every word to ask for pork butt.

    “Please, I would like a, big piece of ass,” she asked.

    My mother wouldn’t even say the word “crap.” After she found out what she had actually said in English, she never visited that butcher shop again. Any time my older siblings re-tell that story, I crack up.

    Love the sign your daughter put on your door. Sounds like Lexie’s not alone in having to dress her husband.

    I think traveling is the best education a child can get. I know this may sound like bad parenting, but we used to take our son out of school so he could travel with us. I think it’s important for them to see the world, and not just read about it. I also enlisted him to work at the Food Bank and other organizations, so he can see how fortunate he was, even though he thought he was hard done by because I wouldn’t allow him to have a television in his room. Poor kid.

    Great post and thanks for sharing with us. You make us laugh and also give us insight into your wonderful family.

    Congratulations on your new home. Enjoy!

    P.S. You really should watch Gone With the Wind. It’s a wonderful movie.

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    • Selena– I think letting your kid travel is good parenting. Teaching kids to help others is one of the very best things we can do for them. During the school year, we work with a program that provides backpacks filled with food to school-age kids who otherwise wouldn’t have enough to eat over the weekend. Both of my kids help clean the backpacks and fill them. They are 8 and 4, but now they understand that not everyone else has food in their cabinets.

      We do something that many people consider awful until I explain it. We tell my kids that we have to pay Santa for their toys at Christmas. I know– it’s a shocking and horrifying thought at first :) . But it makes it easier to explain why some kids get a big Christmas and others need help. It also helps explain why despite repeated requests, they aren’t getting everything on their list. Santa still gets to be the bearer of gifts and Mommy & Daddy get a thank you, too ;) .

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      • LB – that’s not shocking that is responsible parenting…We get names of kids close to my children – try for one boy and one girl. Then I take them out to the store and tell them they pick out the gift (I pay) when I think they are rushing and didn’t put thought I ask “This will be the only gift they get – are you happy with your choice” they go back.
        I like the backpack idea – how did that idea start?

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        • I think the very first backpack program started in St. Joseph, MO (don’t quote me on that). Teachers noticed that many of the kids on the free lunch program returned to school on Mondays hungry and unable to concentrate. They get a backpack filled with nutritious food every Friday and return the empty backpack on Monday to be refilled. There are several different programs in the KC area (and tons of other places around the U.S.). I work with two different programs. One is through our church and the other is through Harvesters Food Bank. They work really hard at protecting the kids’ anonymity (especially middle schoolers who can have some pretty cruel peers). The backpacks are the same ones that the school sells to other kids with the mascot and school colors. When the kids leave with their food backpack, they look the same as every other kid. Panera donates their leftover bread/bakery items at the end of everyday to these programs in the area. One of the things I do is pick up the bread on Sunday nights. You would be amazed at how much bread is left over at the end of just one day. My car smells like bread which is awful for trying to be healthy ;) .

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          • Yes I know about Panera – during Lent we have soup/fellowship on Wednesday and we get a donation from Panera…always different but always yummy. I will have to see if we have the backpack program here. Thanks for the info

      • Thanks, LB. I think traveling is the best education there is, that an reading of course. I think one thing that schools miss out on is teaching kids things like balancing a check book and budgeting.

        I don’t think what you do is horrifying at all. It’s a great way to explain to your kids about Christmas. When my son was young, we had this rule, one toy in, means one toy out. He had to donate a toy. Also, we tended to buy him his sports equipment for gifts and explained he just couldn’t have it all. My son was and still is a sports fanatic, golf, hockey, soccer, ultimate frisby, rugby, LOL. The equipment was expensive, so those were his gifts.

        In our immediate family, nieces, nephews, brothers, etc. we don’t buy Christmas gifts, everyone makes one gift and then we play a game so everyone leaves with a gift. I think each family does what works for them, and it’s so hard these days with kids being bombarded with everything they have to have.

        I just got a Smart phone not long ago, and it’s not because I wanted one, it’s because my family said my flip phone was a dinosaur. It served my purposes, now they seem to want me to keep it on so they can text me. Call me if you want to talk. Geeze. LOL

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        • Every year we have the Great Toy Purge in late September. If you don’t get rid of toys, Santa will not bring new ones.

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          • Purging is going on as I type! Santa is not the motivator – Mom on a cleaning binge is! I get that way before a new semester…want to organize everything before my life goes into chaos!

  47. Cool post, RM, glad you got into your new digs okay…haven’t moved in a long time, prob won’t, not after the hundreds of feet of beds now fully planted, building a formal rose garden, containerized vegetable beds, several patios and a large screen room (great product, with the worst instructions I have ever seen…..). I actually enjoy getting this with my wife, we both are goofy and tend to find cozy furniture that is us..course then again, we have a cat and two birds, one of whom knows he is our son….

    Speaking of the parrot and working from home from your post, had one of those moments in life. Was working from home the other day, and was on a conference call, and switched from handset to speaker phone, and forgot that automatically takes off the mute I was on..and the parrot decided he was missing my wife and son, so he started his yelling routine “where are you, woo hoo” and yelling…..people laughed, must have assumed I had a demented child locked up in a cage or something……

    Ah, yes, tv back in the day..though we were blessed with 7 channels in this area, seemed like we didn’t have twice as much to watch, only twice as much crap…….but you forgot something, you forgot UHF (not the Weird Al movie that my wife rolls her eyes at and my son and I die watching), that piece of alien technology aka the wire loop that sat on the back of the set and seemed to only pick up stations in a language no one could understand, if it got anything at all. In any event, now we have some ridiculous number of channels and often the snow on UHF was more fun to watch (other then some of the stuff on BBC america, specifically Top Gear, and “Sherlock”)

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  48. I was laughing right up until the Brady Bunch theme. My girls just discovered it on TV and have the DVR set to record every show. They do a marathon every Sunday morning. I still remember what happens in each episode. My kids think I’m psychic. (and yes, the damn theme song is stuck in my head — thanks)

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  49. I have the theme song in my head too – now its the Partridge Family. I still know all of the words to “I Think I Love You”. If you all pay me money, I will NOT sing it for you. I only sing for my child, and that is because I started singing to him before he
    was old enough to defend himself.

    Shawn Cassidy was my favourite. David Cassidy seemed too old. I still know the theme to the Hardy Boys series. Christ, I’m such a geek.

    About 15 years ago I spent a year backpacking to the South Pacific by myself. Spent the majority of the time in Australia, but I also went to NZ, Fiji, Western Samoa, the Cook Islands and Hawaii. The things I learned (mostly about myself), where life changing. I highly recommend it.

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    • Kermie, I love your avatar, especially the color my favorite.

      Backpacking through those areas sounds like so much fun and exciting. I was telling my husband that with our of travel and my love of writing, that maybe we should sell everything, travel the world and write about it. One can dream, right?

      As for Shawn Cassidy, I had his poster in my locker. Went to a convent in H.S., nun saw the poster and said with a stern look, “I hope that boy is Catholic.” LOL I said, “Yes, Sister, he’s also an alter boy.” One of my many fibs to the sisters. LOL

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  50. BTW, just got home from the football game, and we won again. Cannot believe the CFL season is almost done. SIGH.

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    • Nobody wants to buy our CFL team. Pathetic isn’t it? This is a hockey, rugby, lacrosse city, but there are many football fans, my husband is one of them, so he watches American football.

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  51. I watched the Brady Bunch some when it was on, and now you have the image of Alice’s bun just bobbing while she blows Sam the butcher. But she’s cheerful about it. So cheerful.
    My husband of 42 years doesn’t always match, but it doesn’t matter because he works for Apple. Their dress code is “wear something”.
    Glad the move went well. I hope I never have to fucking move again, but I’m sure I will someday. I HATE moving. The last two times I moved, I moved unpacked boxes from prior moves. Says something about me that’s probably not so good. Oh well.

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  52. If it doesn’t go with khaki, I don’t own it.

    I am not singing. Being Jan’s age, I saw every regular episode, but I have never seen any of the specials.

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  53. Oh now you’ve done it. First, the Brady Bunch theme and now, “Clean up, clean up, everybody do your share…” I am doooooooomed.

    There are two songs I hear when nothing is going on in my head. Oscar’s “I Love Trash” from Sesame Street, and “Valentine.”

    My husband dresses himself. He took a class when he was getting out of the Navy and swears by it.

    Around the house, he always has an opinion, but he has good taste, and I usually like whatever he thinks we should buy or do.

    Happy new house to you and Lexie and the girls! My new office is purple and smells pungently like Iams dog food since both dogs insist on eating in here with me.

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  54. LOL. What a wonderful post to find as I finally return to the blog. I am so glad your daughter gets to travel. It is the best way to learn to think beyond your own little world. I totally agree with you about the children caring water thing. I just return from a medical mission trip to a village in Honduras. There may be water, but it is not clean. We spent the week providing medical care, food, clothing, and shoes. Every year I am reminded how blessed I am to have a toilet that flushes, clean water, and shoes. You can’t learn that from a book. As one of our leaders said, ” You can’t photograph poor and you can’t smell a picture.” Your daughter will have well rounded education and will be wise beyond her years. A+ for parenting, C- for fashion (at least you wear clothes)

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  55. My husband would pair black and navy. *shudder* I usually don’t have to dress him because he has been with me long enough to know what I would allow to be paired with something else – except the damn black and navy. Okay, I lied; he would also pair a black shirt with brown shoes. Ten years of marriage, and he still hasn’t mastered that yet.

    We have moved twice in our relationship. The second time was much better because we bought my parents’ house, and they had already done all of the repainting for us. We even got to help pick out colors. Of course, then I got pregnant again, we had to rearrange the entire house to get another bedroom, and we had to paint yet another room. You wouldn’t think that in what is technically a 5-bedroom house that we would have so much turmoil (4 room switches!).

    I can’t believe your girls are already back in school! We don’t start until after Labor Day! Then again, we have Wisconsin Dells, and they must have all of our high schoolers to be their minions as long as humanly possible. There are a lot of schools around here that don’t have air conditioning, so it makes for happier kids (and us teachers) when there isn’t any WI August humidity to deal with at school.

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  57. Greetings form HOT Florida. Visiting friends here, spent a day in Disney,
    GASP!! Will be here till Thurs. our friends are from France, so we’re learning some French also!! Now I’m hooked up with wifi, so I can keep up now.
    Great trip Doodlebug, you right, we forget how lucky we are sometimes!!

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